Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Note To Self: Curb Flirty Behavior at Awkward Times

Last week, a couple I often hang out with invited me to dinner at a mexican restaurant one town over. I love Mexican food and enjoy good company, so I accepted. It was the day after my haircut, so my hair was looking pretty nice. It was the end of the day, so many hours since my last shave. The resulting look was pretty peculiar at best; androgynous in a very unflattering way. Given the circumstances, boy mode was the only real option, but as usual, I wasn't quite pulling it off.

When the waiter came to the table he turned out to be very handsome, and having cute guys perceive me as male is always vexing. Normally I would have been really frustrated that I was sitting here with facial hair and baggy men's clothes, and just let him overlook me. Instead a part of me basically somehow forgot I was looking pretty weird, and I found myself wanting his attention. While he was at the table I found myself letting my over shirt slip off from one side, and leaning in a way that elevated that shoulder. When my hair got in my eyes as I browsed the menu, simply pushing my bangs back would not do. Instead I found myself correcting the problem with a dramatic hair flip and a flourish.

He started taking orders with the couple across the booth from me. "For you madame?", "For you sir?"

Then, he turns and as he starts his sentence he gets his first direct look at me. "For youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu...?"

Maybe it was only in my mind. But it seemed, he dragged that "you" out for multiple seconds as he tried to figure out what title it was safe to give me, or if it was best left alone. What made it really funny, is that the stalled sentence was a question. There is that tendency toward the end of a question to let your voice rise. As he stalled on this syllable, his voice just went higher and higher until it reached a comedic pitch. "For youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu...?"

In the end, he must have decided using no title was safest. I suddenly felt very embarrassed as I snapped to my senses and realized how ridiculous I was being. I'm sure the staff got a good laugh out of the whole thing later. But then, I did as well. So there!


chrissie said...

Your posts crack me up, sometimes, girl...!!!


ms.shandy said...

It's not supposed to be funny! You're supposed to feel sorry for me.! LOL!

Actually, I'm just glad that after all that thought, he didn't say "sir." That would have really hurt. :P

Leslie Ann said...

Yep, better to leave 'em wondering.

We need to create a sitcom about your life, I think.

ms.shandy said...

Yes, seems like funny things do tend to happen to me. I Guess I bring a lot of it on myself though. :P

Jamiegottagun said...

Great story. I love it myself when I am able to leave people confused. Often I find more satisfying than convincing them I'm female.

ms.shandy said...

For me it depends on what gender I am presenting as. I don't consider myself a male, so if I am traveling as a guy, and people aren't quite sure I really am one, thats generally satisfying. If I don't detect any animosity, its actually pretty amusing sometimes.

If I am presenting as my true gender it is still a little upsetting to be categorized as a male. Now I can take my knocks and keep my poise though.

Jerica said...

Awww girl. That's kind of funny about the yoooooooooooooooooou? but it still can be hard. I'm glad you can take it lightly.

I can relate to being around boys in guy-mode and being perceived as male. I had a similar thing happen the other day at Tully's. I was waiting for the guy to make my cocoa and I didn't realize it till later but I was leaning up against the counter with my head tilted in a kind of flirty way and when he handed me my cocoa, I said "Thanks!" in my high girl voice. I'm not sure what his reaction was because I turned around and tailed it out of there, blushing profusely. =)

ms.shandy said...

LOL! That's so much like something I would do. So funny! =)


Anonymous said...

Nice dispatch and this enter helped me alot in my college assignement. Thank you for your information.

Anonymous said...

Opulently I agree but I think the post should acquire more info then it has.

ms.shandy said...

I don't recall ever having anonymous commenters before, and I've never been a source for a college assignment, to my knowledge. Flattering!

I'll have to admit though, that I'm a little embarrassed that it had to be this piece. This was a somewhat awkward moment in time for me. LOL!

@anonymous2 I'm sorry this one is a bit short on info. Basically it was a very brief moment that highlights the awkwardness of this transitional phase. :P