Tuesday, November 03, 2009


It has been ages since I have written, and today I am resorting to staying late at work to catch up on my blogging. Why ever would I do such a silly thing? It involves a satellite modem at home which seems to be knocking on heavens door. LOL!

Things have been very eventful since I last wrote. I haven't had the chance to travel any, and I'm feeling a bit claustrophobic, now that I have been no more than an hour away from home for over a month. Since I have mainly been here, most of the news I have relates to my physical transition; specifically my last round of laser.

Early October, I had laser, then life proceeded as normal. But roughly two weeks later, my damaged skin around some of the courses dead hair began to have major irritation. Eventually, most of the hair shed, and it turned out the skin under those former patches of beard looked absolutely disgusting. After a few giving it a few days to heal, I did something brash and stupid. I decided to use microderm abrasion to remove the dead and dried out skin. I ussualy do this, but this time, I did it before the acne liek facial breakouts were completely healed.

What followed that decision was a chain of events that made the next couple of weeks very awkward. The microderm abrasion broke open the acne spots, then spread the bacteria all over my skin, while tearing at the top layer, giving the bacteria a place to settle. My idiotic decision to then slather on a layer of moisturizer sealed the deal, giving the bacteria a moist oxygen free environment to grow in.

Douse this sound like a scenario from an unusually non lethal, superficial episode of House? :P

Well, its not over yet. When the break out spread from these 4 little acne patches around my chin and upper lip, to cover almost the entire lower front of my face, I was in a panic. I ended up buying this Clean and Clear stuff that won an award in Cosmo a couple of issues back for being a gentle way to clear acne. It is really meant to be a spot treatment, but everything was red and swollen, so instead of dabbing it on spots, I just rubbed it everywhere that was remotely red, again, spreading the problem.

Eventually, I had acne that you never see on anyone older than 16, and see probably only in 1 teenager out of 1000. It was just absolutely disgusting. I've been more or less stuck in the office at work for weeks, afraid to get out and do some of m job duties, which fell behind quite a lot.

Finally though, I found a product that worked. A Clean and Clear product based on benzoyl peroxide. The same stuff that kept my facial break outs in check back in my school days. In the ammounts I had to use, it dried my skin a lot, and left a white residue. But over the course of last week, it really sorted things out.

At this point, I am down to two little spots, and a little bit of discoloration that seems temporary.

The really good news? Now that my skin has healed, I can finally appreciate the results of my 4th laser hair removal session. There is practically no hair! There are 4 tiny patches scattered around my jaw line with working follicles close enough together to produce a shadowing effect. Most of the rest of my skin looks totally bare even 36 hours after shaving.

With no makeup or anything, when I look in the mirror now, I see the me I have always wanted to see. Its just the most amazing feeling. And now without a beard distracting me when I interpret the angles of my face, I am seeing estrogen related changes that are more dramatic than I realized. My skin is a little softer, and there is this soft distrubtion of fat in my cheeks that gives my face a much more feminine shape.

Honestly, I am just thrilled. I think I am happier today than I have ever been in my life.

The lesson here, is be very, very careful how you treat your skin, especially after having your face fried with lasers. You could be one poor decision away from the social disaster of a lifetime. Hehe!

Hmmmm! In other news, work is going great the last couple of days, now that I can show my face. I think the lack of facial hair and other subtle changes have not went unnoticed. That probably should concern me, but I Simply can not bring myself to feel anything other than pride. I'm socializing, working hard, and staying super productive, now that I feel good about myself again.

On the home front, I have not fought with Mom and Dad since my last endo appointment. I think they are content to leave me to make my own decisions now. They may even be starting to cope on another level. In subtle ways I can't really put into words, I have gotten the impression lately that they are beginning to shift their perception of me in a very positive way.

I'll sign out for now. It feels so nice righting again. I'm sorry if the gross acne descriptions are a bit TMI. I try to keep my blog honest though, and this honestly has been a very major problem. You would have had to see the severity to understand. Besides that, the possibility is something everyone should be aware of I suppose, though I expect this was a major fluke. LOL!

Anyway, happy, healthy, ad for once in my life proud. And, as I said, signing out for now. So nice to be back!



Melissa said...

Nice to see you blogging again, Shandy! I was begining to miss you.

How good that it all turned out well for you. I can certainly understand the feeling of urgency, that led to a hasty session of dermabrasion. It's good to be patient, and just lest your skin recover at its own pace, but who wants to go around with cruddy looking skin? Lesson learned! I'm sure you won't make that mistake again. I can't wait to see new pics of your pretty feminine face. I'm so happy you are pleased with the changes you are seeing. It means so much to our self esteem, when the image that gazes back at us in the mirror, is to our liking!

Melissa XX

caroline said...

Having waited so long I can understand the urge to see the results but isn't it glorious to feel a hairless face to show the world. Cost me a fortune but priceless.

Caroline xxx

Leslie Ann said...

Well, Shannon, I'm glad you are finally seeing the changes that we've been telling you about for so long. I started seeing a more feminine face last November at Transgiving. Who says there's no such thing as evolution?

Now that your face has cleared, I hope you'll be at the meeting this weekend. I haven't seen ya in a coon's age.

Amy K. said...

Yikes, you poor thing! I can only imagine what your face looked like... actually, I don't want to imagine what your pretty face looked like when covered with sores and pimples. That must have been such a hard and scary time for you. I'm glad it's over!

I hope the `rents are starting to come around as you say. I thought my mom might've been at some point, but it turns out she was shifting gears into full-on denial mode. Like Melissa, I can't wait to see pics of the new and improved Shandy facey. :)